I've been a single parent for 11 and a half years, and with God's love and guidance, even before I gave Him the glory, I've managed to persevere. Lately though, it seems it's like trying to walk in combat boots in mucky, mire/mud. Especially when it comes to trying to help with my oldest daughter's wedding. I am not going into detail but will sum it up as I am just not connected hardly at all to this. Her matron of honor has commandeered the whole show. I financially am unable to contribute much, which makes me feel even less involved. I know that's in my head and believe me, I've been praying for God to lift me out of that mindset. Her soon to be mother and father in law are helping the "kids" a lot, and I do thank God for that, yet it still stings that I'm the mother of the bride and I can do next to nothing. So, I've swallowed my pride and am jumping in feet first to say ok, I'm here, I really can help, I can get a few things, what can I do. The soon to be MIL is being very gracious and we're working together now. The matron of honor is more upset at me for telling her that making plans without consulting me was not right. I keep telling myself that she is young, she has no clue what it feels like. I told her that once she is a parent, she will truly understand my position but pointing fingers at me to try to make me feel guilty for upsetting her, not going to happen.
The wedding has been moved up to NEXT MONTH. They just don't want a huge wedding, have scaled it back and just want to be married, end of discussion. So this little blog is just to ask for your prayers for guidance, for mercy, for determination to get through this without upsetting my daughter or soon to be son in law.